What is not working in your life?

Alright folks, its about to get real, so I want you pause and take a serious look in the mirror. Because I’m going to ask you to give full permission to engage in this next process fully, without judgment. It’s time to look in the mirror and reflect on your life as it is…not the life you daydream about or the way you think your life should be.

I am inviting you do a serious reality check by asking yourself this question:  What is not working in my life?

It may be tempting to consider this groundwork as preliminary, and although helpful, a little unnecessary. But in order to be an active participant in this process, groundwork is the real work because its foundational.

Here’s the reality: Beyond new possibilities and information there has to be a catalyst that generates a desire for change that is irresistibly compelling. From my own experiences I have found that people change, to put it bluntly, when we hate what we have. To put it simply, the despair in our lives inspire us to change.

But in that despair there births the opportunity! Let me show you what I mean:

Firstly, I want you to take a hard look at the condition of your relationships. This may be one of the places in your life that bring up feelings of despair. I want you to let that despair rise to the surface and for you to notice any feelings of condemnation, doubt, or lack of worth. These emotions you are feeling can actually function as catalysts towards your transformation.

Next, I want you to get clear on some things. I want you to get clear about what it is in your life that is not working. So, I want you take a some time and write down 10 things in your life that aren’t working. Move that internal conversation into fine print and give yourself permission to go into detail. Getting specific will lead to a level of honesty that can be compelling enough for transformation.

Now, allow this despair to become your friend. The catalyst for transformation is when you are willing to hate what you have.

Because here’s the thing, you will only be passionate about that which you are willing to suffer for…passion is born in suffering and struggle. A decision to engage sacrifice results from the declaration that I am willing to do whatever it takes , to endure the pain necessary to experience joy in the future.

You are faced with a choice. Will you fall back into the pain of regret because it is familiar and as a result, comfortable? Or will you surrender to the pain of sacrifice so that something new can be born?

So then comes the challenge: make a decision to do what you know you need to do so that your vision can become a reality.

Yes, your circumstances are unique.
Yes, your vision may be very different from mine.
But, you know in your heart, in your gut, what you need to do.

Settling for despair and calling it happines is a choice and that choice rests in your hands. You don’t have to settle! You can choose the pain of sacrifice and lean into what you have decided you are afraid of…engage what you have been avoiding, and experience the energy of being passionate in your vision.

But you have to give yourself permission to experience a life of being held back by judgement and a life revolutionized by commitment.

So in your area of your declaration, ask you yourself what you have been tolerating? Be specific by using details and clarify for yourself the emotions you have experienced as you have tolerated as acceptable.

Still, as you do the groundwork you are going to have to look to the past and identify what is still undone. Check out the next post as we dig up the past and look at unfinished business.